MTV Movie Awards Fashion Review: Nicki Minaj vs. Lil Mama

Bring it on, girlsss!!!

Our first contender goes first, Miss Nicki Minaj!!!

"Yo, yo I'm Minaj yo! If you don't remember me what's the deal wit yo! Pink toes, clerk pants from the waist down! But from the waist up a sad f**kin bondage clown!

But yo, yo, what's that over there yo!"

Errr... Our next contender, Lil Mama!!!

"Clown you call urself u shud be ashamed! Stripper heels, Aguilera's wig this is what it's all about! I'm famous for ruining Avril's Girlfriend, yo! Our rap sound ridiculous but at least urs rhyme. But we both are famous for our fashion crime! Yo! Yo!"

"Hey... That one actually rhymes! Whippeeeee!!"

"Don't be so happy, bitch cuz we ain't the same! These Chinese tattoo it wrote 'Can't Be Tamed'. These bangles are bulletproof they can handle anythin'. So back off before I commit a rap murder sin. Yo!"

"Don't be too happy Nicki Nick look wat Gaga lend me. A f**kin black kryptonite in bangles form. These glaring stare is what you'll remember! It'll hypnotize ur kids, ur man n granfather, into thinkin' my dress is actually prettier!"

"What's that u're sayin' my boobs can't hear u. U call that a dress well I call this jujitsu! Try holdin ur breath for the whole two fuckin' hour! And then we'll talk about whose dress look better! Ah! Yo!"

"Nick u ain't got nothin' I wear a baby dress before! Have u had any diaper rash in ur twenties? That u can't ignore! I even steal wig from Gaga and cut it short. Now take this flying kiss honey, and do give up. Or I'll treat u wit these catastrophe, that can scares a pedophile out!"

"See? Even this Jesus guy loves me and my @ss-balloon. Baby dress, huh? It can't make me puke typhoon! Diapers rash, how bout a colorful scabies? It'll knock u out n scare ur babies!"

"Seriously, honey? That's all u got? I'm tired crossing my legs tryin' to hear u out! My psycho stare can simply kick ur @ss, so if u got ur best, now is the time to tell Mama!"

"I'm so freakin freak even Kristew wanna suck my blood, yo!"

"Ogh, f**k! She's right.. Errr.... Errr.... Gotta go!"

"So does this mean I won?"

"HAHAH! Loser......."

(ps: Sorry I'm not good at rapping and sorry this is the crappiest post I've ever made. Ever. -_____-)

Three Beautiful Ladies, One Beautiful Dress.

Wow. It sound so much like a tittle of a movie or something.
So if it is a movie, the story goes something like this:

Once upon a time, there's one very pretty dress. A white dress. Full with embroidery and lace details. It's super short and sexy, just the way those skinny Hollywood bitches like it; to show their long, lean pair of legs.

Dolce&Gabbana Spring 2011

One of the Hollywood fashion goddess, Diane Kruger, wear it first (as far as I know it) to the premiere of her film, Unknown. Ironically, she looks like she knows the hell what she's doing on the red carpet...

 ....because, as far as I concern, she's working the shit out of it.

Here, she's an angel. Floating on a dark tunnel, on her way into the light.... of fame, that is.

...looking back at the carbs I MEAN, life she had left behind.

She looks glowy, fabulous, pretty, lovely, beautiful. She looks.... PERFECTION. (bow down)

Then Kate Bosworth wear it to some party celebrating her Nylon mags cover yadda yadda yadda something-like-that.

Kate, too, knows what she's doing. To Diane, she said "Bring it on, skinny, ridiculously-leggy bitch!" She didn't put on that khaki jacket randomly. She pair it with a kick-ass ankle boots and sling bag. She wants people to think she's just a lucky pretty girl who puts on anything she could find in her closets and then BAM! She came out looking like one edgy beautiful young Hollywood star. Genius.
Then she poses and take pictures with some random frumpy blond just to proves that she's totally approachable. Evil genius!

Then there's this lovely slutty angel, called the Victoria's Secret Angel, Alessandra Ambrossio, wearing this to an equally slutty-named event; What Is Sexy party. Well, you can say 'sexy' is subjective but when the word sexy is combined with party with an involvement of some lingerie models, you know how it'll end up right?

Isn't it ironic? Alessandra is a model but she's working this dress the least between the three of them. Looking at her, Diane and Kate laugh and say "You should leave this dress to high-class fashionista like us, not some typically tanned, iron-flat hair, flying kiss-pose, tarty lingerie model like you! Hahahahahahaha." Such dress with high fashion statement should not be treated this casual, I'd say.

Anyway, every good thing has to come to an end. And for the little white, beautifully-embroidered dress, it's not a good one.

If a picture paints a thousand words, this picture would have a thousand thesaurus of 'wrongly done'.

And I have to improve my story-telling skills. Till next time guys...

2011 Robin Hood Foundation Annual Gala: The Battle of Two Generations.

I intended to post this last week but something shitty happen with Blogspot so I have to refresh and surprise! NO DRAFT SAVED... So I have to write it back all over again and as usual, I procrastinate till this very day. So whatever it is, lets keep the bitchin going okay?

Sarah Jessica Parker at the 2011 Robin Hood Foundation Gala in Halston Heritage.

"'Sup y'all? Remember me? Of course you remember me! I'm SJ-fucking-P! The fashionista from the 90s hit series turn movies, Sex And The City. I love to wear outrageous, high fashion dress. What? My dress is so..normal? Don't worry... I have something else in store.."

"My freakin big hair! How fucking original is that? Bringing something dead back from the 60s! Who else had done it? This is the kind of hair you'll look in awe and say "I hope I'm not getting the seat behind her". Hahahaha. See guys? I have good sense of humor. I'm adorable!"

"Look at my clutch. It look as if Lady Gaga and Katy Perry had sex and then lay eggs all over it!  How unique is that?"

"That's it guys. I'm ready. People will get so distracted by my hair they won't even notice how hard for me to carry these extra 50 miles of fabrics as I walk. I'm as confident as hell now. Lets go in."

"But wait.... What is that?"

Gisele Bundchen, at the same event, wearing a dress from Emanuel Ungaro Spring 2011 collection.

Emanuel Ungaro Spring 2011

"I'm Gisele, bitch. And they don't call me the highest paid model for nothing."

"It's because I am fucking fabulous. I mean, if I can work a dress made of stage curtain, why can I work a dress that's simply sexy and, well, simple, like this? Heck I work it even better than that meth-addict-looking model. Pft!"

"And I'll keep my eyes on you, SJP. As you and my partner here, have something in common when it comes to ugly hairstyle...."

"Anyway. I'm the centre of this event! You and your bulletproof hair can go suck it! Muahahahahahahahaha!! xoxo. Gisele."

"Oh, fuck this. Get me out of here, Robert!"

Meet the MET Pink Battle

When I saw this picture on People magazine website, I was like, "How could I miss this? How?"

Michelle Monaghan at the MET Gala

Now that's what I called a holy-shit stunning bod.

And I'm really diggin that pink clutch.

I think she really nail this one. I think the dress fits her body well and very striking. Her makeups and hair was really cute too. I'm just concern with the material of the dress. It look so shiny and leotard-ish.

But at least this don't look shiny and leotard-ish...

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley in Burberry

..this look shiny and cheap and look like the dress that make so much noise everytime you try to sit or walk or breathe. It look like something that'll stick to you when you get all sweaty. It look like something you can't wait to take off and say "I'm not wearing this shit again!"

Meet the MET Fur Battle

And to Lucy Liu, Diane Kruger said...

Diane Kruger at the MET Gala After-party

"Bring it on, bitch..."

Diane Kruger in Jason Wu Fall 2011 Collection

But can I say she look bad? What do you think?