Billboard Music Awards 2011: Fashion Hits and (Mostly) Misses.

Well thanks to the deeply shitty internet connection, I'm now far behind my schedule (schedule ape pon ak tataw la). Anyway, lets take some break from all those lovely dress from Cannes and lets take a look of this young Hollywood starlet dress themselves in tacky way. Well, as tacky as Vegas could get, I'd say. But to be honest, I'm pretty glad for this event cause I'm gettin' sick and tired of all that fabulousness of Cannes. I don't know if I could ever be bitchy again.

Now I'm going to take a deep breath... and GO!

Beyonce in Lanvin

Well this is kinda boring isn't it? But don't worry. Momma Tina Knowles to the rescue!

Beyonce's stagewear

And she brought this hot glue gun and a bunch of scrap metals she found on the set of Artificial Intelligence movie.
But actually what I hate the most about this dress is the fact that I can see her lingerie underneath it. Come on Bee. If you wanna go tacky crazy, take some advice from Gaga - ELECTRIC TAPES.

Britney Spears

Well, she looks pretty but this is sooo Britney. Nothing new here.

Fergie in Herve Leger by Max Azria

How did she even made it trough the door? And what with this bondage dress trend? Is it not enough that this people showing cleavages and butts and now they're taking it to a whole new level by bringing fetish-inspired getups onto the red carpet? Geez.

Kelly Rowland in Max Azria

It's so close to being tacky but Beyonce's ex-background singer here looks pretty hot.

Keri Hilson in Rachel Roy

Too many random colors here. Her yellow shirtdress, her green belt, her pink nails, that gold heels and that hair looks terrible on her.

Ke$ha in Jad Ghanour

She looks a little like Heidi Klum, no? Well the dress has interesting design to it sans the tulle but it did nothing to her wide figure. Hey but at least she showed up in a real dress, right?

Kylie Minogue in Alexander Mcqueen

It's amazing how she can still work the cute, young Hollywood starlet looks in her 40s. She looks pretty but the detailing on her dress looks a little weird and clumsily done. Because the runaway version looks better.

Mary J. Blige in Mark Bouwer

Bitch looked fierce.

Michelle Williams

To be honest, I only like those boots. Or maybe not.

Nicki Minaj in Mark Fast

I don't know. I think this is too ugly. Even for Minaj here. The bust part looks severe. Like it is recovering from a terrible car accident or something. And what with the blah color?

Nicole Kidman in Dolce & Gabbana

I kinda like it. She looks cute. Love the braid.

Selena Gomez in Dolce & Gabbana

This is severely attention seeking. Like when she ditch Lovato to befriend Taylor Swift so that she can do a cover of her song or when she date the Bieber. Yucks. And she can't even sing. But I love her song 'Who Says' though. Where were we again?

Taylor Swift in Elie Saab

This is too bland even for Taylor! And why am I using exclamation marks? Cause this is too bland even for Taylor!

Rihanna in Max Azria

What is this? The World Lesbian in Business Convention 2011? Then where's Degeneres?

Travis Barker

Except for that mini-douche, I pity those kiddos...

Oh Taylor.. I wish you 'Mean' it...

So the music video for Taylor Swift latest single, Mean, was here. You can click on the link below to watch it on Youtube.

Taylor looks very beautiful in this video. Well, for me there's two type of beautiful - the one who's already blessed with beauty, and the one who KNOWS how to look beautiful. And in Taylor's case, I think she's both.

The video is still fresh so I can't seem to get any of its stills from Google. But to make it short, it's not that, you know, different from any other music video. It also kinda remind me of Pink's music video, Raise Your Glass. At first I thought it might be the concept of the song but the more I watch it, the more it resemble it.

I've no other complaint than the fact that I wish she looked, well, meaner when she said "Drunk and grumbling on about how I can't sing." Honey, if you were to be bitchy, you ought to show'em. Give your haters the sickest and most sarcastic look you can ever make. But who am I to complain about sweet Taylor being, well, sweet?

Other than that, job well done Taylor. I love the song, I love the message and I know it'd become an anthem to all the unpopular kids out there.

"Alexander Mcqueen:Savage Beauty" Costume Institute Gala - Top 10 Worst Dressed

Now this is where the real bitchery start...

No. 10 Taylor Swift in J. Mendel

Awwww... Look at sweet little Taylor trying to go experimental and dramatic and stuff. I just wonder why she hates color so much? Even when she try to look different, she still go for nude shades. Awwww.. Don't hate little sweet Taylor. I don't think the dress would like to be mention in one of your songs...

No. 9 Jennifer Lopez in Gucci 

"Yes" J.Lo said, "you can blame it 'On The Flower'."
Plus point for the great color though.

No. 8 Christina Ricci in Zac Posen

Wednesday Addams had done quite a great job growing up didn't she? Mommy Mortie would be proud...
Plus points for all the drama though. I should say it's quite nicely done but I have several issues with spider webs and high neck and overwhelming train combo.

No. 7 Karen Elson in Alexander Mcqueen 

Plain dress with scabies. Ugh. Yawn. Next!

No. 6 Ashley Olsen in Dior Couture

The only thing she'll be saying troughout the whole event would be "Ups. I'm sorry. Excuse me. Ups."

No. 5 Kirsten Dunst in Chanel 

What a skill! To turn something as fabulous as that into something that fugly. That must've taken years of practice!

No. 4 Rihanna in Stella Mccartney 

When I first saw this in thumbnails I was like, "Wow. Her butt looks shineeeeeeyyyy..." And what was she doing bending down like that anyway? Aren't she supposed to have people doing that kinda stuff for her. Or maybe not. Because she's not Beyonce (look at No. 1).

Oh God... Please destroy that satan braid.

No. 3 Lucy Liu in Vionnet

Hey.... I don't know Vionnet make gorilla Halloween costume...

WHOOPS. I mean, fabulous gorilla Halloween costume...

No. 2 Jessica Szohr in Topshop

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Seriously, girlfriend? Topshop? At a Gala? Paired with miniature pony ankle boots? Seriously? Are those bangs blocking your sight when you look at the mirror before you leaves the house?

No. 1 Beyonce in Emilio Pucci 

We have a lot to discuss here.

How artistic this kind of picture is? She looks like a young starlet trying to survive the fame that is the Hollywood. Trying to look perfect in the eyes of the paparazzi whereas...

Beyonce: I'm going to KILL YOU if you dare say I look fat in this!
Jay-z: Ehehehehehe... Just smile honey bee.. Keep smiling..
Beyonce: Oh how tight this dress is! Jayjay, if I didn't make it trough this event, I just want you to know how much I love you...
Jay-z: Just keep smiling honey. Ignore all the bad thoughts. It's just your imagination, you know, since the lack of amount of oxygen going to your brain because of your super-tigh...
Beyonce: WHAT? YOU'RE SO DEAD ONCE WE GET BACK HOME!!
Jay-z: Ehehehehe... See? What a happy couple we are. Ehehehehehe...

Beyonce: Now get me the fuck outa here!

To Beyonce, I have some advice to give to you. If:

1) If your head looked as if it's going to pop out anytime,

2) If it seemed like you're never going to experience normal breastfeeding after this,

3) If you need help even walking up the stair, which took, like, an hour for every step, THEN..

You know your dress is too fuckin tight.

For more dress and bitchery, you can click right here.

BONUS: Royal Wedding wannabes.

Demi Moore in Prabal Gurung

Serena Williams in Oscar de la Renta